BREAKING NEWS: Thongs Reported to be Dead...?!?!

"No doubt, male fans appreciate the fact that boy shorts make our asses look so amazing. Let's face it, unless you're blessed with Gisele–like DNA, it's likely that a string bisecting your backside wasn't doing your figure any favors. Most boy shorts have a seam running down the middle of the butt, which accentuates the curvature of the bum for any body, giving the illusion of a Kardashian–style keister" Thong is dead

Whoa Whoa Whoa...Let's hold on just a minute. No one is killing off the thong without He's consent, especially not Cosmo. Not gonna happen. As the King of the Fashion World, He wants to let you know first hand the Thong is alive and well. (He had the girls in his office prove it) He is an ass man, and He is thankful for the growth of the boy short. HOWEVER, in no way should that mean that the thong should just be killed off like an ugly sister. While He is sad that the g-string has gotten a lot less love then used to, He is okay with sharing its play time.

Listen up and listen good. Thong, G-String and Boyshorts, He gives you the BIG 3. VARIETY IS KEY! You cannot wear boy shorts every day, just as you should not wear thongs everyday. He needs to see variety, mix it up, keep He on his toes. But let's be clear, NEVER wear granny p*nties, as that would be a sin.

Cosmo should really check their sources before declaring the thong dead...

-He

P.S. Judging by this American Apparel Ass Competition the thong is alive and well.

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